#freethenipple

After far more deliberation than I ever thought I would have given it,  I've decided I'm team Kim K.   Well, at least on this one issue.   Hear me out...

I don't agree with a lot of what this younger generation of celebrity seems to think is appropriate and what they are willing to do to make a buck.   I love some of Selena Gomez' songs but watching a video of her writhing around on a bed in a bra and panties or just a tee shirt feels like viewing child porn.   And at this point, if you are a woman with your clothes on in a music video,  you are probably making a political statement. I hate the thought that talent is valued far less than nudity and photo-shopped beauty.

At the same time,  I'm totally on board with a woman's right to be sexy.  And the idea that in our real lives we tell our daughters to avoid dressing a certain way, to avoid the rapist.  Then we turn around and say don't blame the victim.   Didn't we just train our girls to accept that they are responsible for what they attract? 

So the whole blow back on Kim K's nude photo is that she's a mom now and therefore it is inappropriate. Also she's sending a bad message to her young fans. 

I'll admit my first reaction was,  oh boy (and why are we supposed to be surprised).   The whole thing seems unnecessary.  I've never felt the need to pose nude,  let alone post a nude selfie. My second reaction was pissed off because the photo she posted was pre-baby.  She failed to mention that in the original post, leaving other moms to feel like failures if they didn't look that good a few weeks after childbirth.   My opinion on that has not changed.

However, in the final analysis,  this is who she is.  A woman who has always been very comfortable showing her body and in many cases profiting from it.   But we live in a free country that guarantees freedom of speech and expression.   And her idea of being a mom is that she gets to continue celebrating her body.   Sure she may have purchased many of those body parts.  But they are now hers to show as she wishes.

So who finally swayed my way of thinking on this? Surprisingly, Amber Rose.   This woman whose claim to fame I understand less than Kim K's, and who has every reason to not like the wife of her ex,  came to Kim's defense.   She defended the right,  and feminist position,  of a woman to not be slut shamed for being proud of her body. As a self proclaimed feminist, and husband proclaimed  Angry Black Feminist, I had to check myself.

I may not agree with her decision to post and certainly wouldn't do so myself,  but she's free to do her.   Personally I hate wearing bras and pantyhose. I consider them to be my sworn enemy.   I give in and wear a bra when my top is too thin, or I'm going to an event where I might make others uncomfortable.   But that's stupid too.  They're my breast and what law am I breaking?   I'm not interested in being topless.  I just don't like cutting off my circulation to conceal my headlights.

Amber Rose and I seem to have that in common.   She posted this photo on twitter for the  #freethenipple movement which is now diversifying to include women of color. The movement highlights the way women are made to feel ashamed of their bodies.  For example it's illegal to breastfeed or be topless in 35 states.   And yes it is 2016.  (But I didn't put the actual photos in this post, only the links, because you might get in trouble at work for viewing them!)

Many men think the feminist movement is anti-man.  Not only is that not true, many of the harshest critics of women are other women.  So let's put an end to slut-shaming for our daughter's sake.  It's our job to encourage our children to share our morals and to show good taste.  But it's not our job to ridicule and pass judgement on others for their choices, which ultimately affect them and not us. 

Kim Kardashian and Amber Rose in one post!  If I keep this up y'all might actually think I'm hip.  That is until I use words like, hip.  Talk to you soon -BMK 

Super Sister to the Rescue!

I’m an awesome sister!  Just ask my brothers.  Or don’t because they’re brothers, so they might mislead you.  Just take my word for it.  I have evidence.

I just got off the phone with my older (like really old... 

... just kidding) brother. He called in a huff, because he’d just received an unsettling phone call. It went something like this:

Phone rings with strange or blocked number.
Brother misses call, calls back because he “always answers or calls back telemarketers to harass them.”
Fellow with Indian accent answers and says he is from IRS headquarters.

IRS: “The local office has sent you two letters to which you were unresponsive.  You are being sued by the IRS for the $1,877.00 you owe.  Do you have a criminal attorney?”

My brother (who happens to be a little lapse in his filings, begins a debate with the guy):  “What address did you send the letters to?  … That’s not my address anymore so of course I was non-responsive.”

IRS: “The letter comes from the local office, I am at headquarters ….”

The call continued in this manner until it was disconnected.

IRS Guy

I held my breath while listening to my brother’s explanation, because I knew exactly what was happening.  My brother was being targeted for identity theft.  Fortunately, he did not provide a current address, nor verify any other information.  Surely, if he was willing, the caller would have gotten him to verify his SS# too. That would be all he needed to file a tax return on behalf of my brother with the refund check electronically sent to the scammers checking account. 

When my brother finished telling the story and I confirmed that he had not given any info, I told him, the IRS will never call you.  That is the most important line of this post.  THE IRS WILL NEVER CALL YOU. 

Relieved my brother said, “See!  You don’t just sit around all day doing nothing!  You are collecting valuable information!”  I collected this info from multiple news reports I’ve seen over the last few years.  IRS fraud is on the rise and will only increase as technology makes it easier for us to file our taxes electronically.  If you suspect you have been a victim of tax fraud or know you have been a victim of identity theft, the IRS has info on the steps to take at this link.  Alerts can be set up for questionable activity.

Identify theft is as popular as American sports, IMO.  I’ve been targeted before by a former neighbor’s boyfriend (my name was Kimya Morris, hers was Kim Morris and we lived in the same building).  He’d put a cell phone bill in my name and somehow my age was altered to make me about 70 years old.  It was annoying and to this day, I use my middle name when applying for credit, so the credit agencies know it’s really me.  But beyond that I continue living an on-line and in-store life that relies almost exclusively on credit cards.  Because they will refund me my money.  Debit cards don’t offer as much protection and clearly cash is just gone.  Here is a list of what protections you have for each type of card. 

In conclusion, I told my brother, what I’ve told lots of friends and family lately … “Download this app!”  J  Of course there’s an app for that!!  True Caller, a free app, allows all its users to report calls as spam.  How does this benefit you?  The app settings allow you to block calls from all numbers others have identified as telemarketers.  A few questionable calls will ring through with a special red caller ID. These are suspected as spam and you can chose to block them immediately.  Then do your part when you receive an unmarked call that turns out to be a telemarketer and help others by marking it as spam.  It takes a village!  I was getting about 5 calls per day after applying for a mortgage refinance last year.  After downloading the app, the calls decreased steadily.  Now I may get a 1-2 a week at most.

Alright, I can’t just sit around all day and blog.  That might be what people think I do! J 

Talk soon –BMK

Me, sitting around doing nothing all day

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This Too Shall Pass (Oh, and pass the peas, please)

I love cooking.  I love cooking, I like eating.  The other night I had a cookie craving around 7pm.  It was a weeknight and my typical post 7pm habit is to be as close to horizontal as possible while watching TV, knitting or drinking wine.  But this night I sprung into baking action.  1.5 hours later I had mediocre cookies.  Which I needed to convince myself were worth the loss of lazy time.  So now you’re thinking, why in the world did it take 1.5 hours?  Did you make really fancy cookies? 

Nope.  I made gluten free oatmeal cookies following a recipe from my friends (in my head) over at America’s Test Kitchen’s book, How Can It Be Gluten Free.  (They were mediocre only because the flavor was slightly different than a regular oatmeal cookie, but still good)  You see my love of cooking is complicated or weighed down by several factors:

I’m VERY lactose intolerant – You can take a blood test to measure how much of sugar from lactose your body will absorb.  My test showed my blood sugar decreased, meaning I didn’t absorb one drop of lactose and my blood was feening for some sugar! (Which may explain the cookie cravings, right :-) I’m mean I’m not a doctor, but ….)

1. I’m gluten sensitive – This means I can eat foods that contain gluten, but there is a threshold at which I will become painfully bloated, my back/hip pain will be triggered and I’m more susceptible to overall achiness.  Where the threshold lies is a guessing game.
   
2. I don’t eat pork and only minimal beef –I’ve never eaten pork.  My mom said it was a no go, and I’m a good girl.  (Though said mom has since stopped following her own advice)  If you’ve never had pork, the thought of eating pig is really not a turn on.  Thus, I never crave it and have no desire to try it.  I stopped eating beef when I was 12 when a friend found a roach in their burger at Burger King.  I didn’t miss it for 20 years.  Then I found myself living in Spain, aka pork country, and very very hungry.  I was BFFs with the cook at the sandwich stand that made Pollo Tropical (a grilled chicken breast sandwich with a tangy sauce).  My dinner was usually 2 scoops of sorbet from Haagen Daaz or more chicken.  So eventually, I was just too damn hungry to continue to forgo beef.  But after a few years of beef gluttony,  the scale and my unaccustomed digestive system caused me to make it a special occasion meat only.
   
3. Lastly, I’m all about texture and smell.  If it’s slimy or it’s not Jell-O, but it giggles, I’m out. If it smells like somebody died, I’m out. (i.e. Hubby’s favorite Norwegian dish, Pinnekjøtt - cured and mutton ribs that are steamed for several hours.  I can’t even be in the house when this is being prepared.  There is no way I’m eating it.)

 

Pinnekjott

So when one who loves to cook has all these limitations, it’s well complicated.  It’s also not helped by my desire for perfection.  I don’t just want to cook.  I want to COOK.  I want you at my table drooling, begging me for more and calling me your Queen!  Too much?  And I want to mix it up.  For years as a one of Beyoncé’s single ladies, I cooked out of necessity and baked for Joy.  I loved entertaining and having an opportunity to get my Martha Stewart on.  But every night cooking was unnecessary and simple meals suited me fine. 

Once I got hitched, I had a captive audience.  And when we adopted Duckie, we adopted an eater. That girl can throw down!  It’s over the last few years that my love of cooking has blossomed.  I now have two in house food critics, whom I greet as my daily culinary challenge.  There’s just one catch.  I’ve waited until the busiest time in my live to want to prepare elaborate meals.  This is the perfect formula for feeling like a failure. 

Yesterday, after squeezing as much work as possible into the 6 hour window, during which Duckie is at school, I picked her up and hurried to her swim lesson.  Hubby arrived during the lesson and I hurried home to get dinner started.  I thought I’d chosen a simpler recipe.  But the chicken cacciatore I started preparing at 4:30pm, hit the table at 6:40pm.  That’s 20 minutes before Duckie hits the hay.

This has pretty much been the story all week.  It’s all part of the adjustment of Hubby not working from home and unable to share in the daytime chores/errands, and  Duckie going hard on the swimming to make the swim team.  At the same time I’m overseeing the renovation of a recently purchased 2 family rental property.  So my plate being so full is leading to their plates being empty, at least until 6:40pm.  At which time, I’m feeling that annoying mommy guilt of having not met the many goals of the day.  Because obviously, Duckie will never be successful in life if she doesn’t have 30 minutes to digest her food before going to bed.

And then, as I was thinking about writing this blog, I had the same revelation I have every time the going gets tough.  This too shall pass!  I’m going to keep loving cooking and hopefully get even better at it.  But Duckie will continue to mature and do more for herself.  Hubby and I will find a balance in the things that need to be done.  And construction (while it may feel like it) is not never ending.  So there will be a time when I get to breath.  And until that time, some nights it may just be PB&J for all.

I like to cook but I’m not a food network kind of girl.  I like details and promises of perfection.  Here are my favorite cooking guides:

America’s TestKitchen – the PBS show and the Cook’sIllustrated magazine provide scientifically tested delicious recipes.  I DVR the show and subscribe to the Cook’s Illustrated website instead of buying the magazine.  All the recipes from the magazine and some from the show are on the site for an annual fee of $40.  I also have their gluten free cookbooks and swear by them. 

The Chew – I’ve previously mentioned I love the show because it’s more than cooking.  But when they cook, something I can eat, they really are cooking live in the studio.  Therefore they are easy to follow recipes.  All of which are on their website. 

Time For Dinner cookbook – Got ground turkey and don’t know what to do for dinner?  This book will give you three meal options to choose from dependent on what else you’ve got in your fridge and pantry.  It also has cook-ahead meals that you can make the weekend before, and ways to make one meal multiple ways to satisfy a family of picky eaters. (Its out of print, but used copies are available for a steal on Amazon)

Kindle – last year I purchased my first digital copy of a cookbook.  I put the iPad in the kitchen and tested out the feel of cooking from a screen.  It’s pretty awesome.  My cookbook shelf is full of books, I don’t take the time to look through.  I was already printing out online recipes.  Now I can search my cookbooks and online in one place and then get cooking.  It also means the recipes are accessible (via app) if I need to check the ingredients while at the grocery store. 

Ok. This post was WAY longer than intended.  I’ve now got T minus 4 hours before school pickup.  Gotta get my Rihanna on and work work work work work work.  Talk soon.

-BMK

Good Advice

I'm a big fan of solicited advice :-)  I'm even good with unsolicited advice, so long as you have no investment in me taking said advice.  In fact, I'm a seeker of advice.  I'm always reading articles and watching reports to keep me in the know.  Also, I'm a big believer in sharing our stories.  Women in particular benefit so much from hearing other women's stories.  Health is an area in which I am most adamant about this.  So many women suffer from various fertility and health issues, believing that they are alone and in some cases that they should be ashamed.  But once you get woman talking you'll find out just how many of us have gone through the same things and have great advice to offer.

So in my mind a good friend is loyal, and supporting and blah, blah blah.  A good friend will share what is actually going on (not the Facebook version of life) and will be available to listen and offer "helpful" advice (not just yeah girl).

Over the last few weeks, I received two pieces of great advice from spectacular women:

#1 Date Night is a Must
I didn't say it was rocket science.  But good advice from a good friend is often easier to follow than something you read in every magazine article on relationships.  In my case, I was burnt out.  Making the adjustment to hubby working outside the house for the first time ever and the impact that had on my daily responsibilities (more kid shuttling, errand running, and getting more work done in less time) was wearing me out.  Duckie was more than a little unhappy about the change and Hubby wasn't thrilled either. So we were all in a snit.  My friend and neighbor reminded me of the importance of date night.  On the surface it didn't seem like something we needed.  We spend an hour or two on the couch each night watching a show and winding down.  But that's no fun.  We used to have fun.  We used to go out and enjoy food, shows. dancing and you know, people.  Then we got cheap and lazy.  We didn't want to pay for a babysitter and a meal.  Then we just forgot. We forgot that dates nights were a thing.

Well we've taken that advice and been on three dates in the last 3 weeks.  And we are having so much fun!  While we may not be able to keep up that pace, we have been reminded that having time carved out for enjoyment as a couple, makes us a better couple.  So now take my advice and get out there.  Even if you only go to the Fro Yo shop, you will still enjoy it, kid free!

At a concert last week

#2 Treat Your Kid Like You'd Want to be Treated After a Stressful Day at Work
If you read last week's blog post, you already know that Duckie is an awesome kid.  The high energy level, and on-going commentary that make for hilarious scenarios at home, don't play so well in school.  My Duckie was made for summer camp, not a classroom.  So she's pretty much always in trouble at school.  And the part of her personality that lets negativity roll off of her, is the same part that causes her to smile at teachers while they are attempting to discipline her.  Take a moment and picture that scene.  You can imagine her teachers pulling their hair out.  So we try and work with the school and teachers to figure out ways to create consequences for her actions.  Sometimes they work for a while.  Most times they don't.  She's not made for sitting still, its just not a thing she can do.  And when forced to do it, she lashes out in other ways.

So I was at my wits end, because her school and home behaviors were equally frustrating for a couple of weeks. This meant she was always in the middle of or coming out of a consequence.  I called my Frousin (friend cousin) for her expert advice (she works in education).  Instead she gave me real life advice.  "If you worked at a job you hated, would you want to come home to be punished for how you performed at that job?"  I needed a Staples red button so I could press it and hear, "That was easy!"  I immediately removed consequences for school that were applied at home.

The old rules still apply, if she doesn't do her school work at home, she'd have to do that at home.  But otherwise, if she has a bad day at school, she can still have a great day at home.  She's not struggling academically, she can be completely disruptive and still get every question correct on her homework or a test (sorry parents of the kids who can't learn because Duckie is partying).  So why was I adding more stress to her day.  Now we have many more good days. Days were she tries harder both at school and at home, perhaps because the pressure is off.  The school still has their rewards plan to keep on track there.  It may or may not work. But at least here, at Casa Nilsen, we can just put our feet up after a hard days (school) work.

Happy Kid and Happy Parents = Successful School Project

So get talking and get listening. There's lots of good advice and experiences to be shared.  For example in the comments box below :-)

Well, I gotta go.  Gotta get Duckie's after school bubble bath ready. Ha! --- BMK

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The only, not lonely, child

If you have met Duckie then you know she's unique.  She jumps out of the bed in the morning smiling and rearing to go.  As soon as she could talk, she would ask where are we going today.  She's never met a person she didn't like (or caught on to someone not liking her) and she's never shies away from an adventure.
She is fearless, a natural athlete and all around the most amazing person I know.

But I'm her mom, so I'm supposed to think she's the bee's knees.  Obviously I do.  But I also think she is extremely fortunate to have this personality and be an only child.  Most people have finally stopped asking us when we plan on having another child.  If you were just thinking of asking, the answer is a day after never.  After reading the above description of my glorious child you might wonder why.  Well I'm gonna tell you:

#1 Don't temp fate.  Every child is different and the easy baby that Duckie was is clearly a set up for baby #2 to never sleep and scream all day.  (its just statistics, people)

#2 Energy (or lack there of).  I'm no spring chicken (what's that? you say I don't look a day over 21?  thanks)  I strongly believe biology wants us to have children young so we can run around and entertain them all damn day.  Finances want us to wait until later to have kids so we can provide for them as much as we'd like.  But really if you wait for the money, you need to wait to be able to afford a nanny too.  I don't have a nanny.  I have a kid who I just said jumps up out of bed smiling every morning and she keeps it going all day.  Stop thinking about Leave it to Beaver and start thinking about if you really wanted to wake up that early!!!  Last thing I need is another kid to come between me and my pillow.

Duckie alone in the snow

#3 Three is the magic number - selfishly we just really like our three-some.  Me, Hubby and Duckie.  We role together as a squad.  We like buying 3 plane tickets and not 4.  I like cooking and having left overs.  Mostly I like not listening to two children bicker (well except when Duckie and Hubby get into it, they bigger like peers - ha!).

#4 She's just plenty - But seriously she is just enough. That's it.  All of our parenting needs are met by Duckie.  And since she has the personality that causes her to excel at only-childom she has no complaints.

She does however have loads of funny things to say, so here's a sample of this week's gems (all should be read imagining a sparkly, wide-eyed and excited 6 year old speaking.):

Summer Camp
Me: So I was thinking of maybe trying sleep away summer camp this year.
Duckie: Wait, what?  A camp where you can sleep!!!
Me: Yes, just like your day camp at the lake.  All the same activities, but then you have a cabin and you get to sleep with the other campers at night.
Duckie: What?! I get to sleep at the camp!!! Oh yeah! Oh yeah!
Me:  But you won't see mommy and daddy and its for two weeks.
Duckie:  Why only two weeks?
Me: Um.... Don't you think you might miss us?
Duckie:  Can I stay all summer?

Summer Camp and then some
Earlier in the week she heard me explaining to Hubby that I didn't think a girls only camp would be right for her.
Duckie:  But wait, at least at a girls camp they might answer my questions and tell us about private parts.
Me: (sigh) What do you want to know about your private parts? Mommy and Daddy can tell u anything u want to know. 
Duckie: Important things!  Like how when the food goes in it comes out as pee. 
Me & Hubby: (relieved) proceed to explain the digestive system. I start showing Google images of the intestines. She has lots of poop questions. As we wrap up ...
Duckie: Great now show me the pictures of the penis!

Ummm hmmm.  One and done.  

Gotta go.  Gotta store up energy for when Duckie gets home for school. Talk soon ... -BMK

How to Chase Away the Winter Blues?

Its President’s Day weekend and I’m not going anywhere!! I am really angry about this. I just can’t show it because my winter blues prevent me from expressing true feelings.  My emotions are frozen. 

I was trying to pull off a trip to the Ice Palace at Quebec City’s Winter Festival.  That plan fell through. Then I was hoping to book a ski weekend.  That fell through.  And while I could offer you many reasons why each plan failed, the truth is they failed because those destinations are cold.  I would love to go skiing in August.  When I’m dying from the heat wave, it would be a great time to hop a flight to a cold mountain top.  But the idea of planning to go somewhere to be colder than I am right now is unfathomable.  So I’m here at home for this extra-long weekend.

There is one exception to this cold crankiness (which is definitely due to aging).  The last two times we traveled on President’s day weekend and Valentine’s Day it was for the winter Olympics.  And both times (Vancouver, Canada and Sochi, Russia) we experienced spring like weather.  And I can’t wait for the summer Olympics to be over so I can start planning for the next winter Olympics.  But in the meantime, I have got to find a way to move past the winter blues.

Duckie has the full blown travel bug now.  She has a huge coin jar which she is using to save for a Disney Cruise (she’s never been on one).  She has a long term plan to go to Australia before she turns 11.  And as of yesterday she was asking if we could start packing for spring break, destination unknown.

Tops on her list are a return trip to New Orleans.  She’d rather than do that, than go to Florida and spend her days on the beach and in the pool.  And I get it.  We do cities really well.  We are the family that gets up eats and then gets to walking from site to site and restaurant to restaurant.  Duckie is the Mayor of any town she is in.  So she loves to get out there and shake some hands and kiss some babies.  Plus her education is really getting in the way of her travel schedule.  She'd much prefer exploring a new or familiar destination to being confined to a classroom.  And I concur. 

 

Duckie even finds the lamppost in New Orleans exciting

I’ve already given in to her request to go to “Obama’s House,” otherwise known as the White House and the US Capital building.  She doesn’t remember her previous visit where she sang ring around the rosy, loudly, through every room on the tour. So we’ll head to DC at the end of spring break (If you’d like to book a tour just contact your congressman or senator.  They will submit the request on your behalf.  Best to plan at least 6 weeks in advance, 3 months is even better)

But, I’ve got to come to terms with the weather. I can go somewhere that does not include guaranteed sunshine, heat and defrosting.  I’ve considered doing a 4 night cruise, just me and Duckie.  I’ve looked at Caribbean destinations, but the cost of going there in peak season is tantamount to burning cash.  I even temporarily lost my mind and priced out Disney. So it’s quite likely that she’ll her way and we’ll start in New Orleans and end in DC.  Stay tuned.

I gotta go, winter calls ... talk soon.

--BMK

The New Stranger Danger

Antoine Dobson famously told us to:

And while his lesson in stranger danger wasn't quite ready for Sesame Street.  The recent awful story of 13 year old Nicole Lovell's abduction and murder in Virgina, brings to the forefront the reality that kids hiding in their room on the cell phone may be just the recipe for some predators.

My Duckie is only 6 years old.  But I was happy to get her the new Kindle Fire which, unlike her old one, allows me to monitor her activity and set limits on the times of day and amount of time she can use the device.  In addition, I must approve every app before she can use it.    Although I'd love for her to Skype freely with her relatives, I'm not giving her access to that app, because I know how many weirdos have reacheed out to me via Skype.  But she's not a teenager, so its a lot easier for me to stay on top of things.

Nicole Lovell was in a Facebook Group called teens dating and flirting.  And before we are too quick to say, I would never let my kid do that, check out the Today Show segment that reveals just some of the apps that allow predators and bullies to pray on our kids.  

The segment focuses on a few of the popular apps about which we parents should be concerned:

Kik - kids/teens don't need a phone number or email address to use this app.  They just create a user name.  This means anyone can contact them and don't need to know their phone number or email address to do so. In other words this app is a no no.

Yik Yak - everyone posts anonymously and the phones GPS makes the post available to anyone within a certain radius.  (I fail to see how this is a helpful tool, for anyone but predators.) So that's a heck no.

AskFM- this is a Q&A forum has been cited as a playground for bullying.  If you kid/teen uses this app they can adjsut settings to block anonymous users. But teens asking teens for advice is a dangerous prospect to begin with (think back to the great advice you received in high school)

Whisper - this is a confessional app (aka a bad idea).  Its supposed to be for users 17 and older (sure, right!)  It exposes the location of the user.

And just when you think you have figured it all out, made sure none of these apps are on your kids phone, Silicon Valley introduces the Best Secret Folder app.  Its sole purpose is to hide content from parents.  Ok fine, maybe its sole purpose is to hide content.  But only teens and cheating spouses need to hide content so .... Anyway, if there is an app, a password or files your kid does not want you to see, he/she can hide it by using the Best Secret Folder.

So the big advice:  When I grew up it was all about stranger danger.  I remember candlelight vigils for missing kids and constant reminders not to talk to strangers; not to get into a car with a stranger; passwords to know if someone was really a friend of the family.  It was all very scary, but in comparison very low-tech.  Nicole Lovell snuck out of her window and into the arms of her predator thanks to technology.

Ay Caramba!  You parents need to figure this crap out.  Because, the clock is ticking and my Duckie is growing fast.  I'll be looking to you for advice when my time comes.

BMK's got things to do ... I gotta go... thanks for reading ... talk soon

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